I have been all over this country, right? I have met people from all walks of life. I have been immersed in many different cultures; and introduced to many different ways of thinking. One thing that I have learned all aross my travels, is the way we pick and choose our friends. I have had the same best friend for now a little over 5 years. Jeffrey has been through it with me; the ups, downs, turns and swerves we have been through should be placed somewhere between a major motion picture and a lifetime miniseries. Susan Lucci will play me if we air on lifetime; Kathy Griffin will if I get on the big screen.
My friends are have always been one of the biggest parts of my life. I dont really get along with my family, so most of the people that are my friends fit into a family space in my head. Huy, my little brother to torment (lol) Liz, my big sister (who torments me :-) ) Maia, my evil twin and so on and so on. Well, today, I got a big shock from one of my other friends. Someone who I thought was a very good friend, acrually stabbed me in the back, pretty heavily, to make herself look good to someone else. Normally, I would look the other way, move on and be done with it. This time, however, I am going to stand my ground. I find it very odd that someone could so easily turn on someone they call a friend. The people who are in my life that I call friends, should wear that title very proudly. It comes with strength, determination, caring and love. I will no longer stand to be run over, or mistreated by any individual on this earth. We are all here for the same reason, and that reason is NOT to bring hurt or malice to anyone elses life. I am really sick and appalled at the way people just through the use of the word friend around; its just like saying "sorry" when you really dont mean it. People need to be held accountable for their actions. My friends know, that in the event that I am wrong, or have hurt them, they will immediately let me know what I have done wrong.
People dont always agree on things; this is a given. But to bring intentional hurt to someone, just because you want attention, or need to feel good about yourself, is an evil thing. I hope that through all of this, someone will get the message that we are all in tough times, and that we need to be strong for each other, not just for ourselves.
I am going to define a friend for you, very simply: A friend is someone, who no matter what, tells you exactly how they feel, stands up for you, helps you in times of need and loves you unconditionally. At least, in my head, that's what a friend is. A friend takes you to doctors appointments, gives you apple juice when you have low blood sugar and picks you up off the floor when you have fallen and hit your head. These are the things that I remember happening. I would like too say thank you to all the friends in my life, the real ones, the ones who have stood by me through all of my troubles this year. The people who have loved me for me, and not what I can give or do for them, are the ones I am most grateful for.
Friendship doesnt grown on trees. You can fabricate it, you cant make it happen when Its not there. Just make sure that when you have people come into your life, make sure its for the right reasons. Make sure that people know what they can gain just by being your friend. Dont, however, let people take advantage of this gain. I have seen it so many times lately, people sucking the life out of others, for their own doing.
I want each of you, right now, to make a list of the people in your life that have done something good for you lately. Then, pick up the phone and remind them that they are important; that they are loved, and most importantly, that they are your friend.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Advice from Strangers
ok. So i am gonna talk about the most important piece of your makeup: SKINCARE!~!!!!!!!~! Now, remember folks, I am by no means a doctor, But i have had 8 years of experience selling and using various types of skincare. I have worked for such lines as Lancome, Estee Lauder, MAC, Prescriptives, Y.S.L. and philosphy, just to name a few. So, I'm gonna give you the skinny on what to really look for when choosing your skincare regime.
Let me start off by saying this: Price tags mean ABSOLUTELY nothing, especially if you get yourself a 300 dollar jar of beeswax and it sits in your cabinet, unused. Also, for those of you who are lazy, and expect extreme results, find yourself the nearest frying pan and hit yourself in the head with it. I cant tell you the amount of times that I have had clients bring an unused jar of moisturizer back to me and say, "Its not doing anything." My question is always this: "Are you using it?" Answer: "No." I scratch my head and move along. You must have dedication to get the results that you want. Whether you are using a 5 dollar or 300 dollar jar, it will happen if you are dedicated.
I wanna speak about advice from strangers, too. How many of you are afraid to walk up and ask for advice from someone you dont know, especially at a cosmetic counter? How many of you watch Oprah or Ellen on a regular basis, and run right out and buy what they tell you to? Its the same concept. You no more know Oprah than I do. SOOOOOOOO dont be afraid to ask these people for help, that is what they are there for. Now, granted, you SHOULD do LOTS of product research before you make a plan. Each counter is trained by its standards to sell you whats in its cases, whether you like it or not. I will tell you, there is a simple solution to the overwhelming amount of products that are available.
First off, you need to decide what your target skincare need is. You cant just buy a regular mositurizer and expect it to take away wrinkles or sun damage. Its not magic. You can however beat the wrinkles and lines if you find the right regime. For those of you ladies who are in your early 20's, this is the crucial point for you to be able to fight off anti-age at the pass. I urge all of you in that age group, to at least have yourself an eye cream. Most important product for you. You will thank me in 10 years. Trust.
Washing the face is a super crtical part of your routine. First off, DO NOT USE MAKEUP REMOVER AS CLEANSER. It does not work that way. You should remove all of your makeup and then cleanse your face. If you use a cleanser in lieu of makeup remover, cleanse your face TWICE. Simply because on the first round, all you are doing is breaking down the makeup, not actually penetrating the pores and dermis to clean it. For you oily kids, get yourself something that is a foaming gel. Gel cleansers are generally designed for oily skins, however, most gel cleansers will leave you dry. Even if you are oily. This in turn, will cause you to over produce oil, and therefore have yourself a nice little breakout. Foaming gels actually give you the deep clean of a gel, but add detergents and things that will foam, and not let you dry out. They act sort of like a hydrator. Combo skins, always use a foaming facewash. Works SO much better. Keeps you dry where you should be, and oily where you should be. So, all of your face is happy :) PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not buy a cleanser with a built in exfoliator. All they do is strip the skin of the essential oil you need, and will dry you out. There is NO need for ANYONE to exfoliate every day (unless your face is made out of leather) Dry skin people: Get a HYDRATING creme cleanser. (estee lauder cream cleanser) You will thank me for the hydration. As far as exfoliators, thermal are the BEST. Used 2x a month, these exfoliators are self heating, giving you a SUPER good deep exfoliation.
Mositurizers come in all shapes and sizes. Truly, until you decide what your REAL need is, there are plenty of BASIC creams that will hyrdate you and provide anti-oxidant protection. Plain and simple. Do your research, but I will tell you that I love Hydramax from Chanel, and I love Daywear Plus from Lauder. The difference is the PRICE. Honestly. Now, as far as mass market goes, my best experince has been from Olay Regenerist. Works good for the budget. Got the same results as with my cream from Lauder.
Serums are my FAVORITE. There is one product in the world that I will not live without. The worlds NUMBER 1 serum is Advanced Night Repair. Estee Lauder. By FAR the best on the market. I did a test with a 450 dollar serum and my 49 dollar ANR KICKED ITS ASS. Not even kidding. It holds 1500 times its weight in water (proven fact) which is CRUCIAL for skin cell turnover at night. It will also boost the action of whatever moisturizer you put on top by 200%. YOu should always have a seperate day serum. I like Olay Regenerist for my day. Actually helped take away some sun damage on my neck. LOVE it.
So, thats a little more on my skincare tactics, If you have any questions, leave me a comment. I must eat now.
Let me start off by saying this: Price tags mean ABSOLUTELY nothing, especially if you get yourself a 300 dollar jar of beeswax and it sits in your cabinet, unused. Also, for those of you who are lazy, and expect extreme results, find yourself the nearest frying pan and hit yourself in the head with it. I cant tell you the amount of times that I have had clients bring an unused jar of moisturizer back to me and say, "Its not doing anything." My question is always this: "Are you using it?" Answer: "No." I scratch my head and move along. You must have dedication to get the results that you want. Whether you are using a 5 dollar or 300 dollar jar, it will happen if you are dedicated.
I wanna speak about advice from strangers, too. How many of you are afraid to walk up and ask for advice from someone you dont know, especially at a cosmetic counter? How many of you watch Oprah or Ellen on a regular basis, and run right out and buy what they tell you to? Its the same concept. You no more know Oprah than I do. SOOOOOOOO dont be afraid to ask these people for help, that is what they are there for. Now, granted, you SHOULD do LOTS of product research before you make a plan. Each counter is trained by its standards to sell you whats in its cases, whether you like it or not. I will tell you, there is a simple solution to the overwhelming amount of products that are available.
First off, you need to decide what your target skincare need is. You cant just buy a regular mositurizer and expect it to take away wrinkles or sun damage. Its not magic. You can however beat the wrinkles and lines if you find the right regime. For those of you ladies who are in your early 20's, this is the crucial point for you to be able to fight off anti-age at the pass. I urge all of you in that age group, to at least have yourself an eye cream. Most important product for you. You will thank me in 10 years. Trust.
Washing the face is a super crtical part of your routine. First off, DO NOT USE MAKEUP REMOVER AS CLEANSER. It does not work that way. You should remove all of your makeup and then cleanse your face. If you use a cleanser in lieu of makeup remover, cleanse your face TWICE. Simply because on the first round, all you are doing is breaking down the makeup, not actually penetrating the pores and dermis to clean it. For you oily kids, get yourself something that is a foaming gel. Gel cleansers are generally designed for oily skins, however, most gel cleansers will leave you dry. Even if you are oily. This in turn, will cause you to over produce oil, and therefore have yourself a nice little breakout. Foaming gels actually give you the deep clean of a gel, but add detergents and things that will foam, and not let you dry out. They act sort of like a hydrator. Combo skins, always use a foaming facewash. Works SO much better. Keeps you dry where you should be, and oily where you should be. So, all of your face is happy :) PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not buy a cleanser with a built in exfoliator. All they do is strip the skin of the essential oil you need, and will dry you out. There is NO need for ANYONE to exfoliate every day (unless your face is made out of leather) Dry skin people: Get a HYDRATING creme cleanser. (estee lauder cream cleanser) You will thank me for the hydration. As far as exfoliators, thermal are the BEST. Used 2x a month, these exfoliators are self heating, giving you a SUPER good deep exfoliation.
Mositurizers come in all shapes and sizes. Truly, until you decide what your REAL need is, there are plenty of BASIC creams that will hyrdate you and provide anti-oxidant protection. Plain and simple. Do your research, but I will tell you that I love Hydramax from Chanel, and I love Daywear Plus from Lauder. The difference is the PRICE. Honestly. Now, as far as mass market goes, my best experince has been from Olay Regenerist. Works good for the budget. Got the same results as with my cream from Lauder.
Serums are my FAVORITE. There is one product in the world that I will not live without. The worlds NUMBER 1 serum is Advanced Night Repair. Estee Lauder. By FAR the best on the market. I did a test with a 450 dollar serum and my 49 dollar ANR KICKED ITS ASS. Not even kidding. It holds 1500 times its weight in water (proven fact) which is CRUCIAL for skin cell turnover at night. It will also boost the action of whatever moisturizer you put on top by 200%. YOu should always have a seperate day serum. I like Olay Regenerist for my day. Actually helped take away some sun damage on my neck. LOVE it.
So, thats a little more on my skincare tactics, If you have any questions, leave me a comment. I must eat now.
Friday, October 1, 2010
Robins
Today was a very interesting day for me. I was going to bring you all a column on skincare, but I had something truly extraordinary happen to me today. Let me set the scene for you.....
I woke up this morning feeling exceptionally anxious. I have had many road blocks and obstacles to overcome this year. Starting with the end of my relationship at the beginning of the year, getting myself a dui and becoming sober, and most recently, losing my job over comments on facebook. All of these problems have brought great financial and mental strain to my life. I have fought hard to maintain my apartment and most importantly, my sanity.
Anxiety is something that I have dealt with almost my entire life. Everything from headaches to panic attacks, its all been there. I wouldnt wish any of this on my worst enemy. I have recently been struggling with the fact that I didnt have a full-time job. Its very hard to pay the bills and keep everything in place when you dont. I have tried everything from medication to breathing excercises to relieve me of the anxiety, all to no avail. Today I discovered something magnificent that really helped me.
Fast forward to today: My really close friend and neighbor, Robin, had a doctors appointment this morning for bloodwork. I offered to go along with her, so she wouldnt be alone. We always have such fun together, laughing and what not. So, off we went, to the doctors. She has known for a few days that I have been in a stress funk. So, she starts off our music selection with Miss Whitney herself; I didnt know my own strength. We talk about the relevance and the significance of these lyrics in our lives today. I know that times have been tough, not just for me, but for everyone. Nonetheless, I have chosen to suck it up and keep a smile on my face; or so I thought.
We get finished at the dr. appt, and Robin tells me she wants to take me somewhere. I reluctantly agree, seeing as how I havent really been up to much lately. The next thing I know, we are in the woods, walking down a most beautiful trail. I began to take in all my surroundings; the earth, the sound of the river nearby, and just the peace of nature. We walk for about half a mile, and we come upon a huge clearing with a giant stone fireplace, a few picnic tables and a grand patch of beautiful, kelly green grass. She instructs me to take off my shoes, turn off my cell phone and walk out to the middle with her. I agreed and did so.
I layed there for about 5 mins, and the clouds opened to the most gorgeous sun I had ever seen. It was so relaxing, and I could literally feel my anxiety stripping away from me. We then got up and she took me to a beautiful old wooden bridge, right across the way. I grabbed my phone for some music. I turned on Pandora and prayed for a song to commemorate the moment. I got my wish. Carrie Underwood has a profound song for me: Wasted. As of today, I am 120 days sober. 4 months. Robin told me to take her hand, and cross the bridge. She also said that when we get to the other side, our troubles are to be left behind. Even If just for the day. I did so, listening to Carrie all the way.
We got to the other side, and my heart was truly lifted. I said, I am ready to face the world again. We started crossing back, and walking to the place where we had left our shoes. I asked for a sign, a sign from the earth, telling me that we were doing the right thing, and that our paths were eventually going to clear. At that precise moment, we turned and looked at the open patch of grass. Tears started streaming down BOTH our faces. I counted, and there were 18 Robins spread out on the grass. There had been no birds there before. Robins are a symbol of grace and comfort. Especially for me, because my mother loves Robins.
I urge each of you, whether you suffer from anxiety, stress, or nothing at all, to outside. Soak up the Earth. Seek out the sources of your stresses. Eventually, your robins will come. In many forms, you will see them.
I woke up this morning feeling exceptionally anxious. I have had many road blocks and obstacles to overcome this year. Starting with the end of my relationship at the beginning of the year, getting myself a dui and becoming sober, and most recently, losing my job over comments on facebook. All of these problems have brought great financial and mental strain to my life. I have fought hard to maintain my apartment and most importantly, my sanity.
Anxiety is something that I have dealt with almost my entire life. Everything from headaches to panic attacks, its all been there. I wouldnt wish any of this on my worst enemy. I have recently been struggling with the fact that I didnt have a full-time job. Its very hard to pay the bills and keep everything in place when you dont. I have tried everything from medication to breathing excercises to relieve me of the anxiety, all to no avail. Today I discovered something magnificent that really helped me.
Fast forward to today: My really close friend and neighbor, Robin, had a doctors appointment this morning for bloodwork. I offered to go along with her, so she wouldnt be alone. We always have such fun together, laughing and what not. So, off we went, to the doctors. She has known for a few days that I have been in a stress funk. So, she starts off our music selection with Miss Whitney herself; I didnt know my own strength. We talk about the relevance and the significance of these lyrics in our lives today. I know that times have been tough, not just for me, but for everyone. Nonetheless, I have chosen to suck it up and keep a smile on my face; or so I thought.
We get finished at the dr. appt, and Robin tells me she wants to take me somewhere. I reluctantly agree, seeing as how I havent really been up to much lately. The next thing I know, we are in the woods, walking down a most beautiful trail. I began to take in all my surroundings; the earth, the sound of the river nearby, and just the peace of nature. We walk for about half a mile, and we come upon a huge clearing with a giant stone fireplace, a few picnic tables and a grand patch of beautiful, kelly green grass. She instructs me to take off my shoes, turn off my cell phone and walk out to the middle with her. I agreed and did so.
I layed there for about 5 mins, and the clouds opened to the most gorgeous sun I had ever seen. It was so relaxing, and I could literally feel my anxiety stripping away from me. We then got up and she took me to a beautiful old wooden bridge, right across the way. I grabbed my phone for some music. I turned on Pandora and prayed for a song to commemorate the moment. I got my wish. Carrie Underwood has a profound song for me: Wasted. As of today, I am 120 days sober. 4 months. Robin told me to take her hand, and cross the bridge. She also said that when we get to the other side, our troubles are to be left behind. Even If just for the day. I did so, listening to Carrie all the way.
We got to the other side, and my heart was truly lifted. I said, I am ready to face the world again. We started crossing back, and walking to the place where we had left our shoes. I asked for a sign, a sign from the earth, telling me that we were doing the right thing, and that our paths were eventually going to clear. At that precise moment, we turned and looked at the open patch of grass. Tears started streaming down BOTH our faces. I counted, and there were 18 Robins spread out on the grass. There had been no birds there before. Robins are a symbol of grace and comfort. Especially for me, because my mother loves Robins.
I urge each of you, whether you suffer from anxiety, stress, or nothing at all, to outside. Soak up the Earth. Seek out the sources of your stresses. Eventually, your robins will come. In many forms, you will see them.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)